Tag: energy

Decisions and consequences

Today I’m going to talk about decisions and consequences. I understand this is a break from the Imbolc related topics of the last few weeks, but it’s needed given some of the rhetoric showing on various social media over the weekend.

But first I’m going to talk about some decisions I made over the weekend and the consequences of those decisions.

Some background

I may have mentioned in my newsletter over the last few months, how I’ve had some changes in my digestive system. And how I’m (mostly) avoiding carbs for now.

This is not down to medical advice, this is down to me observing that most carbs appear to be causing me diarrhoea. Now, I don’t want advice for this, ok? I’m good with where I am and I have to admit that much advice out there on this topic can trigger my disordered eating problems. Please bear that in mind as we go through this.

So, spuds, chips, crisps, pasta, rice, wraps, bread… and it’s not gluten, either. Cos the gluten free stuff – even when I make the bread myself – causes the same effects. There’s no medical reason for this, my body has just said, no.

Thankfully, I am still able to eat chocolate, so the people around me are safe, but it does lead to certain choices.

Decisions and consequences

Which brings me to the weekend.

An image of LANA in lights, the LAna logo. Gorgeous food, but my decision to have chips led to consequences.
I love the food here, but the chips were a decision I should not have made…

See, I’d gone all day with no food. I’d had a coffee, so things were ok, but then our lodger reached out saying he’d not managed to have lunch and was getting a takeaway. (Hence the Lana pic above)

Now I love Lana’s food. It’s great. I’m sure any Asian person of any persuasion would look at the food and shudder at how un-authentic it is. I’m fairly certain it’s Asian food altered for Irish palates. And it bloody works.

I especially love their crispy roast duck with plum sauce. Which comes with chips, steamed rice, brown rice, noodles, spicy chips or egg friend rice. Now, I’ve been avoiding their chips for the last few months, cos again – extreme diarrhoea. It’s not normally worth it.

But last night – oh my gods, I was starving. And I could feel those chips crunching in my mouth. So I said, fuck it and ordered the chips.

Decisions and consequences people.

It took about 30mins after eating before my stomach started complaining, and I spent the next 4 hours or so heading in and out to the toilet. To say it was less than comfortable is an understatement.

Why am I telling you this?

Well, a) to remind myself that making this particular decision was still probably worth the consequences. But also b) because of the rhetoric I’ve seen on social media all weekend about US people “calling down” goddesses in general and war-goddesses in particular.

Why am I writing about this?

Well because there appears to be an essential disconnect here in those who are just coming to the knowledge that goddesses exist and the consequences of poorly thought out decisions they might make.

I’ve have said over and over again that building relationships is the way to go with the Irish pantheon in particular. From speaking to other practitioners dealing with other pantheons at the weekend, it appears like most spiritual beings prefer some relationship before you ask them for a big, massive favour.

And then comes the accusations of gatekeeping.

It appears that warning potential practitioners or newcomers that there might be consequences to their decision to call on a goddess of war is gatekeeping that goddess.

It wasn’t what anyone was saying, but hey ho. Here we go.

I see it over and over again

People coming from a (mostly) bloodless religion like Christianity (in the present day: I’m well aware of the bloody history of the Catholic Church and probably most of the other churches under the umbrella of Christianity. Just cos Ireland wasn’t converted by the sword doesn’t mean I’m unaware of it happening elsewhere) aren’t used to consequences spiritually speaking and practically speaking for decisions they make.

Don’t believe me?

How many Christians have made God a promise in a time of crisis and then forgotten about it?

“I’ll never do X again, if only Y happens”

Ring any bells?

In my experience, the Christian God doesn’t take that personal a role in His followers’ lives. It’s a safe enough religion in that respect.

That’s not the case with most of the pagan deities. Maybe it’s because there are fewer pagans in the world than Christians. A quick google search tells me there are about 3,000,000 pagans in the world, spread out over thousands of deities, but there are somewhere between 2,300,000 and 2,600,000 Christians in the world, all looking to one God.

But either way, a pagan goddess will not let you away with that shit. They expect you to keep your word or deal with the consequences of your decisions.

Yes, your decisions have consequences

This is something white women in the US in particular appear to be waking up to. Renee Good’s murder appears to have woken up the white woman community in ways the deaths of Keith Porter and others (check out this map here) did not. Better late than never, definitely. And we’re not diving into racism here, cos, y’know, I only have so much energy.

But there appears to be this attitude of entitlement. That once someone hears the name of a deity, they can just “call them down” to fix the mess. And pointing out that this decision might have consequences beyond our current understanding is treated as gatekeeping.

It’s genuinely not.

It’s trying to help people.

The amount of people who think they’re entitled to help from Irish deities because they have a great, great, grandparent from Ireland, but know nothing about us, our history, our geography, our politics, our social issues, our people… it’s concerning.

And the fact that so many people are willing to put themselves out to try and save these newcomers to the non-Christian spiritual world? It’s amazing.

But it’s not fucking gatekeeping.

I mean, is it gatekeeping to keep a child from putting their hands in the fire?

So, what can you do if you are just starting out?

Well, first off, read up on the deity you’re looking at. Preferably from native sources. That means, if it’s an Irish deity you’re thinking about, read from an Irish author. Not someone who moved here 6months ago and claims to know everything! Fuck’s sake, I’ve been living here most of my life, and I don’t know everything.

I spent over a decade in England and I wouldn’t claim to know everything about them either. (Although I know enough… and I did marry one…)

Pray. It’s an under-used form of spiritual work.

And put some practical work into this mess, as well as spiritual work.

Gotta be honest, I’m not sure why the Morrigan would be overly interested in the US, but she might help some of her followers there. Brigid? Maybe, she travels a fair bit, but again, don’t expect an easy right of it.

Practical work?

Yeah, practical work.

I know protesting isn’t for everyone. It’s definitely not for me – I can’t handle the crowds. But here’s some stuff I’d be looking into if I were in the US right now:

  • Financial support. Money is needed. Bail, medicines, fuel, food…
  • Childcare
  • Administration
  • Organisation
  • Clean up
  • Call or email your elected representatives
  • Educate yourself and in particular in the US, look at the Black and Native educators out there. If I can find them from Ireland, you can find them as well.
  • Offer save havens for those returning from protests or going to protests.
  • Be a witness

I’m sure I’ve forgotten loads of stuff here and y’know, you can google as well as I can. Not everyone is built to be a front line warrior and not all of us have to be. Supply lines, support staff, all these people are important as well.

Back to decisions and consequences

No matter what decisions you make, there will be consequences.

If you choose to get involved physically and in person, you may be isolated, attacked, injured, jailed.

If you choose to support on the supply lines side, you may get your name on a list, or get highlighted in your community.

Fascism loves to keep records remember. And they start with one community, then move onto the next. The first concentration camp in Germany in the 1930’s was Dachau, founded in 1933, and was aimed at political prisoners, Roma, and Jehovah’s Witnesses. The first Jewish prisoners arrived in 1938.

So, let’s try and learn from history.

And choose which consequences are worth it and which aren’t.

Because this bullshit isn’t going away and we all have to made decisions.

(And yes, for those who may be worried, my digestive system is grand today again!)

Energy is rising!

I’m lucky that the energy is rising at the time I most need it.

Yes, I am re-using this song. It’s a great song!!!

Now, I get it. You might be thinking, wasn’t last week’s blog post all about energy? Well, yes, it was.

But I want to get more focused this week. On specifically, the energy I can use and feed off – and the energy you can use as well!

Energy rising?

Look, I know. Ireland at the minute is having a cold snap. There was frost ALL over this morning.

Unfortunately, not bad enough for an excuse to stay home from work, but still…

OK granted, not much energy rising in a picture of a sheep in a lightly snowed landscape (this looks similar to my garden this morning but it was too dark to get a pic!) Picture is of a sheep in a snowy, Irish field, hills in the background and a lone tree standing.
No, this isn’t my garden, it was took dark to take a pic, but it’s a close representation

So, why am I talking about energy rising? Because the earth is stirring. I can feel it. Below the frost, there is energy. New life is starting.

I mean, the sheep in that pic doesn’t look pregnant, but there’s a chance she is. (Unless it’s actually a ram – my sheep expertise mostly runs towards staying out of their way, to be honest)

The days are getting longer. Not massively, as yet, but definitely there’s a few minutes each day. On 21st December, we technically had 7hrs 29mins of daylight. Today? We have 7 hrs 43 mins.

I know 14mins doesn’t seem like a lot, but trust me on this, ok?

We use this elsewhere as well

Much of the New Year, New Me energy builds from this as well. It’s riding a wave of rising energy. We’re emerging from the winter darkness. And ok, the darkness is still there, but we can see the light approaching.

Now, I’m not a fan of completely overhauling your life as that blog post will show. But there’s a means to engage with the energy without overkill.

For me, this is the time to prepare for planting those seeds. Not actually plant them yet, but get ready for it. Make sure the soil is prepared, ensure there’s water and nutrients and rest and everything ready. Clear the decks for growth so to speak.

How can we do this?

Well, here are some options:

  • clear up any loose ends from before the holiday season
  • help the energy move by moving yourself
  • help the energy move by giving the house a good scrub – or however you can manage a clean.
  • clear out your head! (More on this later)

What I will be doing

Well here’s the thing. Mostly, life will be continuing as normal. However, there are a few things I will be doing to make use of the energy.

This morning, I’m wearing a nice outfit for work. A green dress, with brown boots and a brown cardie. Dressing nicely does help me in the gloomy mornings. And the boots are comfy, but also give me a “fuck off” walk, which helps a lot in work these days when everyone is all eager-beaver and trying to catch up on all the stuff they didn’t finish before Christmas!

But there’s another reason to dress differently. It helps me rotate my clothes. So, I’m not doing a massive clear out or anything, but by taking a few minutes every day to assess a different outfit from my usual “work top and plain trousers”. It’s a way for me to migrate from the pre-holidays “Christmas outfits every day” to more standard fare.

I know it won’t last. But it’s nice while it does.

I’m also making a list of shorter jobs that need doing, but I just don’t get around to. So, for example, I had some candles melt really weirdly a few months ago – I just need to clean up the candlebra so I can use it again. Will take about 15mins, but I’ve just not done it yet.

Riding this wave of new year energy, I’ll make a list of similar things to be done and tick off as many as I can.

What I won’t be doing

Even with the energy rising, I will not be overhauling my life. I’ve learned over the years, that while it’s possible to use the rising energy of the year to do this, it doesn’t work for me in terms of lasting change.

Energy rising in January is more about clearing the way, laying the foundations, that sort of thing. So no, I won’t be starting a massive new exercise routine. I won’t be implementing a whole new nutritional plan.

I definitely won’t be committing to hours and hours of “self care” in the form of expensive treatments, time consuming hobbies, etc.

But this is your busiest time of year?

Yes, it is. And I will be surfing that rising energy wave all the way to March. Possibly April, to be honest. But it’s about the small actions for me right now.

Look at this list for items to do in January in an Irish garden. There’s mostly prep work and continuing work going on, not new work. That’s my approach.

So, yes, I will be setting some things up for Imbolc. I will be organising some online rituals, will probably be holding a retreat for the occasion. I will be helping people lay the ground work for the coming year.

Remember!

The calendar year is just that – the calendar year. It was set by Julius Caesar, with some accommodations by Pope Gregory XIII in the late 16th century.

There’s nothing really magical or innovative about having a New Year in January, other than we all need a bit of celebration in the winter. You can start afresh at the beginning of each new moon, new month, new day, new hour…

But it’s worth considering carefully how to take advantage of the rising energy and optimism of a clean new year.

(And, if you can, try not to feed the horrendous things being done by the US in particular, but also Israel and Russia in the new year. That’s not the sort of energy we really need to be rising right now! If you have energy to work on it, fight as best you can, however you can!)

Ascending to Imbolc

Ascending to Imbolc and lighting candles all round us! A female looking hand holds a small thin lit candle against a background of more candles.
Your Imbolc prep requires candles, right?

I’ve written before around preparing for Imbolc. I mean, I generally write a few times a year on the topic. But this year, I want to discuss ascending to Imbolc. Because, I want to change the focus a little bit.

I want to talk about coming up out of winter and into Spring.

Out of darkness, into the light.

Away from dreams and into action.

Do you get the feeling I’m projecting? The energy of the earth is starting to wake up again. The plants have already started growing again here in Ireland. No, seriously.

Climate change is real.

Ascending to Imbolc

But what do I mean by ascending to Imbolc?

Just that, really. The movement from dreaming to doing. The change in energy of the earth. Part of the year when we start thinking about “new year, new you” rubbish.

A picture of some green snowdrops with white petals showing against brown twigs and brown earth.
Snowdrops, in Dublin on St. Stephen’s Day

It won’t be long before we’ll be proclaiming the “grand stretch in the evenings”.

And, yes, I know, half of ye, at least, are still in a stupor of Christmas turkey and ham, boxes of sweets, mince pies, etc. But that’s half the reason that Imbolc feels like an ascent rather than a descent.

The energy is low at this time of the year. We’ve just passed midwinter, the Solstice, when the sun is at its weakest (in the Northern Hemisphere – of you’re in Australia, New Zealand, Oceania, etc – come back to this post round the end of June, ok?)

But now?

Now the energy’s rising! (From about 25 seconds in anyway)

We’re moving upward. Out of the winter blankies. Out of the earth. Into the sun. Ascending to Imbolc.

Practically speaking?

Well, it’s the perfect time to start thinking about developing that daily spiritual relationship with Brigid. Or thinking about developing your own spiritual path. But aside from that.

Ascending to Imbolc can mean putting in the last preparations for the festival. Cleaning the house, clearing out the energy after being stuck in winter. Shaking out the cobwebs – figuratively and literally. Read something challenging – either because of literacy level or challenging ideas.

Start gathering what supplies you need, or planning when your ritual will take place. Or start planning to do nothing at all, and how does that look?

Look for the signs – things like those snowdrops. Or the grass growing. Maybe buds on trees, or even leaves.

Recognise the world around you is ascending as well. The development and growth during winter is usually underground – seeds and plants hibernating in a way. And we do it as well. Get through to the end of the year.

But now? Now it’s clear decision time. Where is your energy going to go come spring? When we ascend into Imbolc, when we climb the metaphorical ladder to return to the light, what are we returning to?

The world as it was?

Or are we choosing to change?

Maybe it’s too early yet

Maybe it’s a bit early yet to plan out the year all in one go.

But if you have the chance – make some decisions now. Write them down. Get organised to put them into place.

Then once we’ve ascended into Imbolc – it’s all go, no holds barred, let’s do this thing!!

St Brigid had a temper!

Trust me, St. Brigid had a temper! This is prompted by yet another query in the Facebook group at the weekend saying they can only find “meek and mild” depictions of St. Brigid. Now, I’ve written about this before, but this time, I feel it’s worth exploring in more depth in a fully blog post.

Now look. This isn’t going to be our usual stuff. I’m talking purely about the saint in this post and I will be referring to the hagiographies available on UCC Celt.

PIcture of my Brigid stature, holding a flame, in front of a cauldron, with a lit tea light on the cauldron and a Brigid's cross in between Brigid and the cauldron. Trust me, St Brigid has a temper - what sort of meek and mild woman holds fire in her palms!
PIcture of my Brigid stature, holding a flame, in front of a cauldron, with a lit tea light on the cauldron and a Brigid’s cross in between. What sort of meek and mild woman holds fire in her palms?

Example 1: Rejecting a marriage offer

This to me is a key understanding of St. Brigid’s temper. Her Da isn’t too bad here, but her brothers are being a pain in the arse. So she takes steps. Seriously steps.

Shortly afterwards a man came to Dubthach’s house to woo Brigit. His name was Dubthach moccu Lugair. That pleased her father and her brothers. ‘It is difficult for me’, said Brigit, ‘I have offered up my virginity to God. I will give you advice. There is a wood behind your house, and there is a beautiful maiden [therein]. She will be betrothed to you, and this is how you will recognize it: You will find an enclosure wide open and the maiden will be washing her father’s head and they will give you a greater welcome, and I will bless your face and your speech so that whatever you say will please them.’ It was done as Brigit said.

Her brothers were grieved at her depriving them of the bride-price. There were poor people living close to Dubthach’s house. She went one day carrying a small load for them. Her brothers, her father’s sons, who had come from Mag Lifi, met her. Some of them were laughing at her; others were not pleased with her, namely Bacéne, who said: ‘The beautiful eye which is in your head will be betrothed to a man though you like it or not.’ Thereupon she immediately thrusts her finger into her eye. ‘Here is that beautiful eye for you’, said Brigit. ‘I deem it unlikely’, said she, ‘that anyone will ask you for a blind girl.’ Her brothers rush about her at once save that there was no water near them to wash the wound. ‘Put’, said she, ‘my staff about this sod in front of you.’ That was done. A stream gushed forth from the earth. And she cursed Bacéne and his descendants, and said: ‘Soon your two eyes will burst in your head.’ And it happened thus.

Dubthach said to her: ‘Take the veil then, my daughter, for this is what you desire. Distribute this holding to God and man.’ ‘Thanks be to God’, said Brigit.

– Bethu Brigte (14 – 16)

Not only did she put her suitor off, but when her Bacéne tried to force her, she plucked out her own eye to stop him and then burst his two eyes as punishment. This is not the action of a meek and mild, biddable woman. This is a woman who has grown up with a bunch of brothers and is well used to fighting back. St. Brigid is used to losing her temper in this scenario and knows she pays her brother back

Example 2: Healing a leper – possibly out of spite

On the same Easter Sunday there came to her a certain leper from whom his limbs were falling, to ask for a cow. ‘For God’s sake, Brigit, give me a cow.’ ‘Grant me a respite’, said Brigit. ‘I would not grant you’, said he, ‘even the respite of a single day.’ ‘My son, let us await the hand of God’, said Brigit. ‘I will go off’, said the leper. ‘I will get a cow in another stead although I obtain it not from you.’ ‘. . .’, said Brigit, ‘and if we were to pray to God for the removal of your leprosy, would you like that?’, ‘No’, said he, ‘I obtain more this way than when I shall be clean.’ ‘It is better’, said Brigit, ‘. . . and you shall take a blessing [and] shall be cleansed.’ ‘All right then’, said he, ‘for I am sorely afflicted.’ ‘How will this man be cleansed?’, said Brigit to her maidens. ‘Not hard, O nun. Let your blessing be put on a mug of water, and let the leper be washed with it afterwards.’ It was done thus and he was completely cured. ‘I shall not go’, said the leper, ‘from the cup which has healed me — I shall be your servant and woodman.’ Thus it was done.

– Bethu Brigte (23)

Now, ok, plenty of people read this differently to me. They see it as St. Brigid looking for a way to support this poor leper one way or another. But when I view it, I see it as an exasperated Brigid looking to get this man away from her one way or another. In other words, St. Brigid losing her temper in exasperation.

He says explicitly he doesn’t want to be healed, but she goes ahead anyway to heal him. No one else ever seen a healer heal someone out of spite? I sure as hell have!

And the poor woman ends up stuck with him anyway, because she has to take him on as a servant. Can you imagine the frustration she felt… Or possibly a consequence for St. Brigid losing her temper!

Example 3: Unfair dealings with “her” bishop and St. Brigid loses her temper

On the following day, Tuesday, there was a good man nearby who was related to Brigit. He had been a full year ailing. ‘Take for me today’, said he, ‘the best cow in my byre to Brigit, and let her pray to God for me, to see if I shall be cured.’ The cow was brought, and Brigit said to those who brought it: ‘Take it immediately to Mel.’ They brought it back to their house and exchanged it for another cow unknown to their sick man. That was related to Brigit, who was angry at the deceit practised on her. ‘Between a short time from now and the morning’, said Brigit, ‘wolves shall eat the good cow which was given into my possession and which was not brought to you’, said she to Mel, ‘and they shall eat seven oxen in addition to it.’ That was related then to the sick man. ‘Go’, said he, ‘take to her seven oxen of choice of the byre.’ It was done thus. ‘Thanks be to God’, said Brigit. ‘Let them be taken to Mel to his church. He has been preaching and saying Mass for us these seven days between the two Easters; a cow each day to him for his labour, it is not greater than what he has given; and take a blessing with all eight, a blessing on him from whom they were brought’, said Brigit. When she said that he was healed immediately.

– Bethu Brigte, (25)

This time, St. Brigid is explicitly described as “angry” and well she might be. Deceit is not something she tolerates much, unless it’s for the greater good. And in this case, it was depriving a holy man from his just payment. Not to mention, putting into danger the healing of the sick man. Even if St. Brigid didn’t have a temper, any healer would be angry at a patient being put into danger.

Example 4: St. Brigid losing her temper at a cantankerous woman

Oh yes, I love this one! When St. Brigid doesn’t adhere to what a donor expects after receiving a gift of apples, both the woman and St. Brigid lose their tempers!

Once she was hurrying on the bank of the Inny. There were many apples and sweet sloes in that church. A certain nun gave her a small gift in a basket of bark. When she brought [it] into the house, lepers came at once into the middle of the house to beg of her. ‘Take’, said she, ‘yonder apples’, Then she who had presented the apples [said]: ‘I did not give the gift to lepers.’ Brigit was displeased and said: ‘You act wrongly in prohibiting gifts to the servants of God; therefore your trees shall never bear any fruit.’ And the donor, on going out, sees that all at once her garden bore no fruit, while shortly before it had abundant fruits. And it remains barren for ever, except for foliage.

– Bethu Brigte (32)

Now, ok, it’s saying St. Brigid was “displeased”, but honestly, denying the woman and the tree any further fruit on the basis of the woman’s behaviour reeks of temper to me!

Just from one hagiography?

Yes, that’s just from the one hagiography. And remember – these stories were meant to show the best of the saints they venerated. So the saint having a temper, losing said temper, getting angry, taking steps… none of this was considered wrong or to be concerned about.

It was something important – that she would stand up and use her anger and her temper to support those she deemed in need of it. Whether it was herself, with her brothers, her bishop, her patients… whoever and whatever, she used that temper.

But don’t be coming to me saying she’s all meek and mild. For the love of all you hold holy, read the damn manuscripts! They’re available for free!!