The topic of change came up during our Brigid’s Forge Collective session last night. And I thought it warranted writing about today. Because so often, we want things to be different, we look for it, beg for it – but forget the basics.
I’ve written before about Brigid and liminality, not to mention transformation.
But change, real, physical change is difficult at the best of times. And last night I came out with the sentence: “If you want to change, you have to change!”
Hugely profound, I know. But it’s an extension of the “Be the change you want to see in the world”
Why talk about change?
A quick Google Scholar search brought 6.4 million results on “change management process“. There’s a reason for that!
Now, I’ll let you into a secret. The key to a successful change management process is twofold:
- Successful stakeholder management
- Clear preferred outcomes
That’s it. Seriously.
You can see how this works in large organisations, right? There’s a decision made somewhere that X is moving to Y. Now this could be as wide ranging as changing the graphics or the company logo down to altering the core working hours by 30mins for a particular office.
It doesn’t matter which it is, to be honest. The point is – it is change.
And people – as a rule – don’t like it.
So, successful stakeholder management. This doesn’t mean getting everyone involved to agree to the new way of doing things. It means making sure everyone is aware of upcoming new way of doing things. Getting alignment rather than agreement.
Alignment is one of those weird corporate words. It generally means someone has agreed to go along with whatever is happening and publicly support it, even if they think it’s batshit cracked to be even thinking of this right now.
Yeah, I know.
But the whole process depends on key stakeholders holding the party line, at least long enough to pass through the gauntlet of the process. We’re aiming for minimising resistance, not eliminating it. A bit of resistance is good for a change process – it can highlight key elements that need to be considered that might otherwise have been overlooked.
The second bit – being clear on the desired outcomes – is vital to ensuring success. For a start, if you’re not sure what the desired outcome is, how do you know you’ve been successful? And trust me when I say, the simpler the better.
“Higher employee enthusiasm” is all very well and good, but how are you measuring it, what does “higher” mean, higher than what, which employee, what do we mean by enthusiasm… you can see where this is going?
“Moving from a 3.5 to a 4.0 on the employee satisfaction survey by end of Q3 2026” is much better. It’s clear what’s being measure, how it’s being measure and what the time frame is. Of course there are going to be more detailed elements below this. There will be projects, and initiatives and all sorts. But the key element, the root and heart of the change itself, is simple but clear.
What do large organisations have to do with me though?
Well, here’s the thing. Change management is based on people. And chances are, if you’re reading this blog, you’re a person as well.
Internal change needs to be the same as external change.
- Be clear on the change you want to see
- Manage your stakeholders
Now, if you’re looking at yourself, what does this mean?
Well, first off, what do you want to change? Or rather what’s the outcome you hope this change will drive?
“I want to get fitter” is an outcome. But it’s not very clear. Some outcomes from this might be:
- complete a press up
- run 5k
- walk to the gate and back
- complete a circuits class, doing all the exercises, without dying
- Complete the Camino de Santiago
You can see how all these would come under the heading of “being fitter” for some people, right?
And I’m using fitness rather than anything else cos it tends to be more commonplace. And less personal. People don’t get as upset by talking about doing a 5k as they do about the mention of a daily prayer, for example.
Alright, I can hear you screaming about stakeholders, now as well.
Here we go.
Stakeholders
I know. You don’t really see the need for stakeholder management when making a more personal change. Allow me to challenge you on that.
How about you? Do you not count as a stakeholder? You need to manage yourself, your own expectations, as much as you manage other people.
Are you going to commit to the work required to make this change? Maybe it’s a daily step goal. Or a 3 day a week running routine. Possibly become a regular attendance at class?
And then think about timelines. Support.
It’s been a long time since I did a couch to 5k program, but I definitely remember the need to manage my food differently when I did so. I had to be more prepared and that meant saying no to other things.
Committing to attending one meeting in work meant missing out on something else. Agreeing to found and run an organisation meant saying no to engaging with a different organisation.
All of this is managing stakeholders.
And that’s before we get into other people.
Explaining to your family that you’re not available at 6pm on Thursdays any more so they may have to eat dinner without you. Rearranging childcare to allow time for your new challenge. Explaining to work colleagues that actually, no, you aren’t available to work late on Monday nights any more and you have a hard cutoff at X time.
This is all stakeholder management.
Planning your change
Any change requires planning. It doesn’t matter if it’s as simple as a reminder on your phone or major changes to family routines. All change required planning.
I got the above journal for free at a recent conference I was at and I sat down one Saturday night and talked it through with my husband, how I would use it, when I would use it, where I would use it…
Current goals are a Mon-Fri journaling habit, first thing in the morning. Well, not quite first thing, but close enough. It’s hit and miss at the minute, but we’re getting there.
But I used getting this journal as the catalyst for change. I decided when, where, how I was journaling. What is taken care of by the lovely journal, and why is because it’s good for my mental health!
And I don’t have “journaling” written into my diary or anything, but it is part of my morning routine, which is in my diary.
Planning works.
Bringing it back to spiritual change
I’ve deliberately not mentioned spiritual change the whole way through this post. Well, except for that one bit about prayer daily. But now let’s come full circle and return to Brigid.
So many people tell me “I want to deepen my relationship with Brigid”. The problem is that no two people have meant the same thing when they say that. So we probe. And I have a series of questions to help here:
1. Who is Brigid to You?
- When you say “Brigid,” what does that mean to you? A goddess, a saint, a symbol, a presence?
- How do you currently experience Brigid in your life?
- Is your image of Brigid shaped by childhood teachings, personal experiences, or something else?
2. What Does “Relationship” Mean?
- What does a healthy relationship with Brigid look like for you?
- If you imagine this relationship as a friendship, partnership, or something else, what qualities would it have?
- What do you feel Brigid offers you, and what do you offer Brigid?
3. What Does “Deepen” Mean?
- When you say “deepen,” what would that look like in your daily life?
- Does deepening mean more trust, more intimacy, more devotion, more freedom, more creativity?
- What would be different in your life if your relationship with Brigid were deeper?
4. Current Practices
- How do you currently connect with Brigid—prayer, ritual, nature, creativity, study?
- Which of these feel nourishing, and which feel like obligations?
5. Desired Feelings and Outcomes
- What feelings do you want to experience more often—peace, joy, inspiration, closeness?
- What do you hope will change in your life as a result of deepening this relationship?
6. Barriers and Challenges
- What gets in the way of feeling close to Brigid? Doubt, guilt, busyness, old beliefs?
- If those barriers were gone, what would your relationship look like?
Try it out!
Now, ok, deepening your relationship with Brigid might not be what’s on your mind right now. But I bet those questions will help you get clear on some other things as well. Give it a try!!
