Tag: morals

St Brigid had a temper!

Trust me, St. Brigid had a temper! This is prompted by yet another query in the Facebook group at the weekend saying they can only find “meek and mild” depictions of St. Brigid. Now, I’ve written about this before, but this time, I feel it’s worth exploring in more depth in a fully blog post.

Now look. This isn’t going to be our usual stuff. I’m talking purely about the saint in this post and I will be referring to the hagiographies available on UCC Celt.

PIcture of my Brigid stature, holding a flame, in front of a cauldron, with a lit tea light on the cauldron and a Brigid's cross in between Brigid and the cauldron. Trust me, St Brigid has a temper - what sort of meek and mild woman holds fire in her palms!
PIcture of my Brigid stature, holding a flame, in front of a cauldron, with a lit tea light on the cauldron and a Brigid’s cross in between. What sort of meek and mild woman holds fire in her palms?

Example 1: Rejecting a marriage offer

This to me is a key understanding of St. Brigid’s temper. Her Da isn’t too bad here, but her brothers are being a pain in the arse. So she takes steps. Seriously steps.

Shortly afterwards a man came to Dubthach’s house to woo Brigit. His name was Dubthach moccu Lugair. That pleased her father and her brothers. ‘It is difficult for me’, said Brigit, ‘I have offered up my virginity to God. I will give you advice. There is a wood behind your house, and there is a beautiful maiden [therein]. She will be betrothed to you, and this is how you will recognize it: You will find an enclosure wide open and the maiden will be washing her father’s head and they will give you a greater welcome, and I will bless your face and your speech so that whatever you say will please them.’ It was done as Brigit said.

Her brothers were grieved at her depriving them of the bride-price. There were poor people living close to Dubthach’s house. She went one day carrying a small load for them. Her brothers, her father’s sons, who had come from Mag Lifi, met her. Some of them were laughing at her; others were not pleased with her, namely Bacéne, who said: ‘The beautiful eye which is in your head will be betrothed to a man though you like it or not.’ Thereupon she immediately thrusts her finger into her eye. ‘Here is that beautiful eye for you’, said Brigit. ‘I deem it unlikely’, said she, ‘that anyone will ask you for a blind girl.’ Her brothers rush about her at once save that there was no water near them to wash the wound. ‘Put’, said she, ‘my staff about this sod in front of you.’ That was done. A stream gushed forth from the earth. And she cursed Bacéne and his descendants, and said: ‘Soon your two eyes will burst in your head.’ And it happened thus.

Dubthach said to her: ‘Take the veil then, my daughter, for this is what you desire. Distribute this holding to God and man.’ ‘Thanks be to God’, said Brigit.

– Bethu Brigte (14 – 16)

Not only did she put her suitor off, but when her Bacéne tried to force her, she plucked out her own eye to stop him and then burst his two eyes as punishment. This is not the action of a meek and mild, biddable woman. This is a woman who has grown up with a bunch of brothers and is well used to fighting back. St. Brigid is used to losing her temper in this scenario and knows she pays her brother back

Example 2: Healing a leper – possibly out of spite

On the same Easter Sunday there came to her a certain leper from whom his limbs were falling, to ask for a cow. ‘For God’s sake, Brigit, give me a cow.’ ‘Grant me a respite’, said Brigit. ‘I would not grant you’, said he, ‘even the respite of a single day.’ ‘My son, let us await the hand of God’, said Brigit. ‘I will go off’, said the leper. ‘I will get a cow in another stead although I obtain it not from you.’ ‘. . .’, said Brigit, ‘and if we were to pray to God for the removal of your leprosy, would you like that?’, ‘No’, said he, ‘I obtain more this way than when I shall be clean.’ ‘It is better’, said Brigit, ‘. . . and you shall take a blessing [and] shall be cleansed.’ ‘All right then’, said he, ‘for I am sorely afflicted.’ ‘How will this man be cleansed?’, said Brigit to her maidens. ‘Not hard, O nun. Let your blessing be put on a mug of water, and let the leper be washed with it afterwards.’ It was done thus and he was completely cured. ‘I shall not go’, said the leper, ‘from the cup which has healed me — I shall be your servant and woodman.’ Thus it was done.

– Bethu Brigte (23)

Now, ok, plenty of people read this differently to me. They see it as St. Brigid looking for a way to support this poor leper one way or another. But when I view it, I see it as an exasperated Brigid looking to get this man away from her one way or another. In other words, St. Brigid losing her temper in exasperation.

He says explicitly he doesn’t want to be healed, but she goes ahead anyway to heal him. No one else ever seen a healer heal someone out of spite? I sure as hell have!

And the poor woman ends up stuck with him anyway, because she has to take him on as a servant. Can you imagine the frustration she felt… Or possibly a consequence for St. Brigid losing her temper!

Example 3: Unfair dealings with “her” bishop and St. Brigid loses her temper

On the following day, Tuesday, there was a good man nearby who was related to Brigit. He had been a full year ailing. ‘Take for me today’, said he, ‘the best cow in my byre to Brigit, and let her pray to God for me, to see if I shall be cured.’ The cow was brought, and Brigit said to those who brought it: ‘Take it immediately to Mel.’ They brought it back to their house and exchanged it for another cow unknown to their sick man. That was related to Brigit, who was angry at the deceit practised on her. ‘Between a short time from now and the morning’, said Brigit, ‘wolves shall eat the good cow which was given into my possession and which was not brought to you’, said she to Mel, ‘and they shall eat seven oxen in addition to it.’ That was related then to the sick man. ‘Go’, said he, ‘take to her seven oxen of choice of the byre.’ It was done thus. ‘Thanks be to God’, said Brigit. ‘Let them be taken to Mel to his church. He has been preaching and saying Mass for us these seven days between the two Easters; a cow each day to him for his labour, it is not greater than what he has given; and take a blessing with all eight, a blessing on him from whom they were brought’, said Brigit. When she said that he was healed immediately.

– Bethu Brigte, (25)

This time, St. Brigid is explicitly described as “angry” and well she might be. Deceit is not something she tolerates much, unless it’s for the greater good. And in this case, it was depriving a holy man from his just payment. Not to mention, putting into danger the healing of the sick man. Even if St. Brigid didn’t have a temper, any healer would be angry at a patient being put into danger.

Example 4: St. Brigid losing her temper at a cantankerous woman

Oh yes, I love this one! When St. Brigid doesn’t adhere to what a donor expects after receiving a gift of apples, both the woman and St. Brigid lose their tempers!

Once she was hurrying on the bank of the Inny. There were many apples and sweet sloes in that church. A certain nun gave her a small gift in a basket of bark. When she brought [it] into the house, lepers came at once into the middle of the house to beg of her. ‘Take’, said she, ‘yonder apples’, Then she who had presented the apples [said]: ‘I did not give the gift to lepers.’ Brigit was displeased and said: ‘You act wrongly in prohibiting gifts to the servants of God; therefore your trees shall never bear any fruit.’ And the donor, on going out, sees that all at once her garden bore no fruit, while shortly before it had abundant fruits. And it remains barren for ever, except for foliage.

– Bethu Brigte (32)

Now, ok, it’s saying St. Brigid was “displeased”, but honestly, denying the woman and the tree any further fruit on the basis of the woman’s behaviour reeks of temper to me!

Just from one hagiography?

Yes, that’s just from the one hagiography. And remember – these stories were meant to show the best of the saints they venerated. So the saint having a temper, losing said temper, getting angry, taking steps… none of this was considered wrong or to be concerned about.

It was something important – that she would stand up and use her anger and her temper to support those she deemed in need of it. Whether it was herself, with her brothers, her bishop, her patients… whoever and whatever, she used that temper.

But don’t be coming to me saying she’s all meek and mild. For the love of all you hold holy, read the damn manuscripts! They’re available for free!!

The Brigid Sessions

After the dirty mire of my post earlier this week, I wanted to do a bit of a brain cleanser and work towards something positive. So I wanted to write a bit about the Brigid Sessions. I’m having a lot of fun with people joining these sessions, and because they are a short, focused means of coaching, it helps a lot more people.

So you’re selling something?

Well, yes. That is the base of this deal. For a price of $227 or €197, you get three sessions with me.

Session 1: Know Yourself (45–60 mins)
We begin with you. Your gifts, your resources, and the places in your life where Brigid’s energy is most needed. This is a deep, intuitive dive into your personal landscape.

Session 2: Co-Create Your Path (30 mins)
Together, we’ll shape your next steps. Whether it’s joining a local group, starting a creative or spiritual project, or something entirely unique—we’ll craft a plan that feels aligned and doable.

Session 3: Refine & Rise (30 mins, one week-ish later)
After you’ve had time to explore and reflect, we’ll meet again to adjust and refine. You’ll leave with clarity, confidence, and a sense of sacred momentum.

This is targeted coaching on a single issue. Although, I should warn you, no one who has signed up so far has ended up delving deep into the issue they thought they were signing up for.

So, no one is getting what they want?

Not exactly.

I’ve had someone sign up to talk about a portable altar, and end up talking about how to gain Brigid’s help in engaging with her mother.

Someone else came in looking for support on connecting with Brigid, we ended up clarifying her meditation practices and how to work through difficult times.

The last example I’ll give is someone going through a very messy, difficult break up. And looking for some Brigid support. We ended up working through water magic and going with the flow.

(OK, if I’m honest, there’s been more than one example that would fit into the above three samples. I’m trying to keep things vague enough so people don’t feel identified, while concrete enough to let you see what’s going on).

But as always with Brigid, things are rarely clear cut. And sometimes that first session, the deep dive into your current situation, resources, gifts and the bits of your life that Brigid could help with – that’s truly valuable. Hence why it’s so long, compared to the other two.

Because once you get clear on what and where you want that help, the asking for help is reasonably straightforward.

Who is this for?

Well for anyone. But as ye all know, I predominantly work with women, coming out of a rigid spiritual set-up, usually from a Catholic/ Christian background, with an interest in Irish spirituality.

As well as people looking for an extremely practical approach to things.

This is highly unlikely to end up giving you energetic work to do. It’s far more likely to have you out digging a garden than praying. Prayer is always a useful part of life. Don’t get me wrong. But in my experience, prayer supports practical action, not the other way around.

So, is there a thorny issue in your side that you want to deal with? Are you prepared for some close questioning to get to the root of your issue?

Is there something you feel you can ask Brigid for help with, but it feels vague and airy-fairy?

Click on the link and sign up.

Money problems

Given the mess that is in the US right now, I’m doing the same here as I do for the Hope and Healing Hub. For every full paying session, I’m gifting one as well.

So, if money is an issue, reach out and I’ll put you on the list.

Most of all?

Remember Brigid looks after the cowless. She worked to help women in her community. She stands for those women in male-dominated professions.

Her help is there – but she won’t cross the line without being asked.

And neither will I!

Brigid and morality

Not my usual topics, I know – linking Brigid and Morality. But there’s a broader theme, here, I promise!

For a change, I’m covering something a bit topical in the wider world: The Coldplay Debacle. To be clear, Coldplay has nothing to do with this at all. Well, other than this couple being at one of their concerts.

I’ve got to be honest, my housemate shared with with me the relevant picture, with the words, “Have you heard about the Coldplay scandal?” And I was genuinely shocked. For someone who grew up in a time when Gary Glitter was synonymous with 2rock scandal”, Coldplay is just not in the same league.

And no, I’m not linking to anything mentioning Gary Glitter.

If you like your scandals a bit more manageable, check out the behaviour of the major bands from the 70’s and 80’s. Throwing tellies out the window, drunken debauchery with possible teenagers, random acts of “rockstardom”… seriously. Way back in the depths of Gen X youth, rock stars were rebels. Coldplay? Not so much.

A picture of Chris Martin, about whose morals I have no question. I'm dubious about his links to Brigid, but his morals are probably grand...
Obligatory picture of Chris Martin from the concert in question.

Extramarital affairs

Now, most of the time, I say what consenting adults do in private is their own business. And I stand by that. No one has any right to be telling any consenting adult what they can and can’t do.

But, as humans, we have obligations to others in our lives. And for me, a major obligation is a life partner to whom you’ve promised fidelity. So, this post isn’t covering polygamous relationships. Not the ones where all parties are fully aware and knowledgeable about the extent of the polygamy and agree to it.

But an affair is different. Very different.

For a start, at least one party to the relationship hasn’t consented to this element of the relationship. I mean, most of us like to know who we’re sleeping with, even by proxy.

Brigid doesn’t dictate morality to us. There are no “10 Commandments” in any pagan spirituality. Even the famous Wiccan Rede is a) applicable to only a small element of paganism and b) not exactly what it says on the tin. Our morality is up to us to define and live up to.

So, why am I writing about extramarital affairs?

Spirituality, Brigid and morality

I said above that Brigid doesn’t give us a list of rules to run our lives by. That’s not the way her morality works. I’ve written before on how she informs my ethics, but that’s just not the same as morality for me. So, how do I look at this?

Morals can be defined as “standards of behaviour” or ” principles of right and wrong”. But there so much nuance involved here. It’s very easy to say “killing people is wrong”.

But then…

Brigid doesn’t ask us to roll over and not defend ourselves. There are few people in the world that would argue against fighting back to save your own life. Or to save the life of an innocent.

We each draw the line where think it’s best placed. Thankfully, I’ve not killed a person in my life. But I know from friends of mine who have served in the armed forces that taking a life leaves a mark.

It’s not necessarily a black mark or an evil mark, but it’s a change. Brigid doesn’t dictate “no killing”. But she has rules around right relationship. And when death is appropriate and when it is not.

If we are to live in line with our morals and with Brigid, how then do we decide what are our morals?

Determining our morals

For me, saying I won’t kill in most circumstances is a fairly easy choice to make. Joining any armed forces was never really a consideration for me. Being in a situation where killing a person was a reality has also not been a consideration for me.

I live a quiet life in many ways.

But just extend that out then. Does Brigid and my own morality limit how I imagine behaving with others? I hope not, because there are times and days that imagining some grievous harm to others is what gets me through the day! I know in reality it’s completely unrealistic and extremely unlikely to happen, but y’know…

Equally, when it comes to extramarital affairs: if both parties in a marriage agree to an open relationship, that to me isn’t an affair and isn’t a moral issue. But when one party decides to cheat and the other party isn’t aware of it – that’s a definite moral issue. Or it is to me.

There are people who view the bonds of marriage differently. For centuries, marriage was a business transaction, not a romantic one. And of course, rich and powerful men (usually men, but sometimes women) have always been able to get away with adultery with few consequences. Ahem. it becomes an issue when one party expects fidelity and the other doesn’t.

So, when looking at walking Brigid’s path and determining your own morality guidelines, what should you consider?

The ultimate test for morality – and Brigid!

For me, the test has never been Brigid, morality or indeed anyone else. For me, the test is whether I can look at myself in the mirror or not. Brigid and morality have little to do with it, but that’s my test as to whether I’m happy with my behaviour or not.

Because while I might agree, in general, that killing people is wrong, if someone threatened my niece? Totally different story. I’d willingly give up my own life and others to save her. (Hopefully this will never be tested, mind)

When you look into yourself, do the inner work, really assess yourself and you’re happy with what you see? Chances are, you’re probably ok.

But if you’re hiding your face from a kiss cam at a concert?

Maybe time to reassess where you stand…