Why seek a spiritual coach?

Yes, this is a lead on from the High Control Religion series I’ve been doing over the past few weeks. But there is a strong link in the need for a spiritual coach and those of us who escaped, left or otherwise quit a high control religious environment.

The reasons one might seek such a coach are, of course, a bit broader than that, but over the coming weeks, I want to investigate why people look for spiritual coaches, what to look for and some red and green flags to keep an eye out for.

What is a spiritual coach?

I’ve seen a few explanations online for this sort of coach so here’s a few of them. (And yes, the below are all copied from the first page of links Google threw at me when I asked “what is a spiritual coach?”)

• A spiritual coach (SC) works with clients to better understand themselves and their places in the world.
• Within a safe environment to explore beliefs and experiences, a SC encourages clients to tap into their inner wisdom and intuition
• A SC helps people to connect to their desires, identify obstacles and take actionable steps toward their goals.
• A SC is someone who runs their own coaching business and helps people improve their spiritual lives and develop themselves in various ways.
• Spiritual life coaching is a type of coaching that focuses on helping individuals connect with their spiritual foundation and purpose
• A SC, also called spiritual life coach, helps people discover who they are by supporting their self-discovery journeys.
• Spiritual coaching is a holistic approach to personal growth that focuses on connecting clients with their inner selves.

Even the most specific of those are still a bit woolly, right? Or is it just me?

See, I know what I mean when I describe myself this way.

I mean, I work with predominantly women, mostly 40+ in age, mostly with kids that are getting towards independence, mostly who have the time to think properly about things now and are noticing all the shit they didn’t notice when they were younger and were focusing on survival.

I so sometimes help people a bit earlier in the process, those who are trying to recover from a high control religious environment, but I’m not a therapist. Not a psychiatrist. Not a psychologies.

So, I do my bet to guide people towards the professional help they need if they need that.

So what does that mean?

Mostly, I find coaching is asking the right questions. People generally have the answers themselves. This is especially true when I work as spiritual coach.

Why do people look for one?

There are a number of reasons.

Now, first off, there are loads of extra stresses and strains in modern life, as well as an increased awareness (well in certain parts of the world anyway) of science and nature, that lead people to discount the Divine in the world. At the same time, those stresses and strains can cause us to focus ever more on the material or mundane aspects of life.

It’s hard to think about Divinity, religion and spirituality if you’re struggling to get enough food to eat or don’t have secure housing, after all.

That’s also part of the reason I tend to get women who have children approaching independence. It’s hard to think of the divine when you’re up to your eye balls in dirty nappies. I don’t care what anyone says – there are practicalities in life.

It’s also why I think most cults, religious movements, religions are founded by men… Historically, when would women find the time? (And yes, I know – there have been some founded by women, but look at the percentages ok?)

What can a spiritual coach help with?

There are a few things. But it’s important to remember that who you choose is as important as what you choose here.

A coach can help you clarify where you’re struggling. I mean, seriously, this is true of all coaches, but spiritual coaches as well. Half the time clients come to me with one very clear problem – and as we talk, it’s nothing to do with that at all, but something out of left field altogether.

Getting clear on what is at the root of your struggle, or concerns, or unease is vital.

And then, you can start to figure out the path forwards from there. But when you don’t even know where you’re starting from, it’s even more difficult to find your way.

Usually, spiritual issues come up with that deeper sense of meaning most of us search for in life. Look, you’re reading a blog devoted to an Irish deity and saint, plus some related topics that have been part of my own spiritual journey. You probably have some interest in this topic.

If you don’t – kinda questioning why you’re reading to be honest?

My deeper meaning? Helping women navigate a spiritual path that works for them. And spreading clear, authentic, based-in-lore information about said Irish deity and saint. Brigid, in case you hadn’t realised. And no doubt, this will continue to evolve as I grow and evolve. And yes, I had some strong coaches around me to help me get where i am today. Although, several of them probably wouldn’t identify as such.

Next steps

If any of this resonates with you or you want to chat further, send me an email and we can discuss. (orlagh@mybrigidsforge.com) Now, it’s possible you don’t need a spiritual coach. That’s absolutely fine. Many people work through life never needing one.

But if you do – well, next week, we’ll look at how to identify one…